![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
PROMPTCALL
This entry is going to be full of nonsense, because I'm stuck sitting up at my laptop when I should really be asleep, and the only answer for this is fic, and tea, and probably the gouging out of eyeballs tomorrow morning.
Once again, the friendly vampire of insanity has bitten me on the neck, and it's a free-for-all call for anything to do with Final Fantasy VII, Baccano!, Gundam Wing (mostly the Magnificent Bastard people of Wing,aka the Best Friends make for Better Enemies lot), Good Omens, Ocean's Arithmetic 11 (+1/2) and Final Fantasy XII's (Archadians, please). Go!
To spur you/me on, here, have a completely unrelated and far too cracky drabble that my ocha-fuelled brain has produced!
Hapless SOLDIERs (Third Class) A, B and C discuss SOLDIER, First Class
SOLDIER A: Patrolling sucks.
SOLDIER B: We're Third classes, what do you expect?
SOLDIER A: They spend thousands of gil putting us through crappy genetic therapy, and the best they can do is make us walk around Sector 8? At 2 in the morning? On a weekday? While paying us peanuts?
SOLDIER C: That's why everyone tries to become a First. Apparently you get to bring in personal effects and rearrange your schedule however you see fit.
SOLDIER B: The Firsts get to do whatever the hell they want whenever there isn't a call to arms in Wutai. Have you seen the training room after a slow day?
SOLDIER C: What's left of the training room, at least.
SOLDIER A: It's not just the training room. (shifts helmet) Being First suddenly means that you're allowed peripheral vision again. (shifts helmet) Is it any wonder so few SOLDIERS live to see even Second? (shifts helmet) Damn it.
SOLDIER B: If you stop twitching the thing, you might actually get used to it.
SOLDIER A: I don't think I'll ever get used to willingly suffocating myself. While wearing Shinra's really high tech idea of horse blinkers.
SOLDIER C: It keeps you faceless. Makes you more intimidating.
SOLDIER A: (still shifting helmet) Is that why being First is so bloody hard? You have to be like Sephiroth - terrifying even when the damned helmet is off?
SOLDIER B: (mildly) It's even more effective when he smiles.
SOLDIER C: Entire platoons have been motivated into action by Sephiroth smiling.
SOLDIER A: As opposed to the ones who are merely encouraged by Genesis leaving them abandoned at the top of mountain ridges?
SOLDIER B: You're not still bitter about that.
SOLDIER A: As far as I'm concerned, Genesis' idea of a good time is entirely fucked up. I don't know of any other commander who'll take his green platoon out to the Wutai border, pitch them against each other in endless training sessions, and then walk off and leave us to fend for ourselves against an ambush he more or less set up himself. Not to mention that he did this at the height of a bad season - the rebels were practically rabid for our supplies, they fought like goddamned madmen!
SOLDIER C: But you did rack up a lot of experience and a hefty bonus. Genesis brought you all back victorious, and that assault practically laid the path for Sephiroth's B-team advance.
SOLDIER A: SOLDIER has all us pretty screwed in the head if we think that nearly dying is a valuable life experience.
SOLDIER B: It is. You value life a lot more afterwards.
SOLDIER A: You're stationed under Angeal. You have no right to talk about life; for the most part, you guys actually have one.
SOLDIER B: Angeal is probably the sanest of the Firsts, yes.
SOLDIER C: And surprisingly hands-on. I hear he gets to know practically ever new SOLDIER in his platoon, especially when they're on operation.
SOLDIER B: He's taken particularly to that guy from Gongaga.
SOLDIER A: Fair? Zack Fair? The kid who thinks that buying enough gel and wax will help him have hair like Sephiroth?
SOLDIER B: Yeah, Zack. Angeal's training him up for promotion, and doing a pretty good job of it.
SOLDIER A: Does he have to use a leash? Or just he just hit Fair on the nose with a newspaper when the guy yabbers on too much?
SOLDIER B: Angeal's got pretty much infinite patience.
SOLDIER C: He's good friends with Genesis.
(pause)
SOLDIER B: Pretty much infinite patience.
SOLDIER C: Admittedly, Genesis does quote that poem a bit too much.
SOLDIER A: "The gift of the goddess." One day, someone needs to burn all the fucking copies of LOVELESS.
SOLDIER C: I'm not going to be the one picking your remains off the bottom of the Plate, thank you very much. Genesis' temper makes the worst drill sergeant seem like a kitten in comparison.
SOLDIER B: He's not too bad whenever he drops in on Angeal's sessions with us.
SOLDIER A: I think that's just because he finds Angeal very funny. Being merciful is obviously Genesis' idea of a good joke.
SOLDIER B: True. "Pampering them again, Angeal?" (parrots) And that was after we were doing our fifth set of 50 squats in physical.
SOLDIER C: At least the both of you have commanders who are around for more than half the time. Ever since he got made General, Sephiroth's turned up around once every ten missions.
SOLDIER A: What do you expect from the war hero and amazing heartthrob? If he's not too busy fending off armed militants, he's probably trying to wrangle himself free from crowds of women who'd sleep with him on the word go.
SOLDIER C: Are you jealous?
SOLDIER A: (shifts helmet) Why would I be jealous of a man who has incredible amounts of leeway within the Company, apparently no limit to his paycheck, a ridiculously overpowered inventory -- have you seen what Science gives him? -- and almost unwarranted popularity amongst both SOLDIER and the female demographic?
SOLDIER C: (clears throat) I see.
SOLDIER B: That's Shinra for you. There's props for being intelligent and pretty, even if you're nothing more than a army kid.
SOLDIER A: We're highly trained, Mako-infused and elite army kids.
SOLDIER B: We're still pretty much worth the shit on Sephiroth's boots, though.
SOLDIER C: (sighs) Heads up, it's time we got back to HQ.
SOLDIER A: Another night, and another six hours of time killed in the service of Shinra's public protection policy. (yanks off helmet) Free air at last!
[Edit:] The comments are where all the replies are going to go. Right now, we've got:
- Final Fantasy VII characters and their hobbies (Rufus, Sephiroth, Angeal, Tseng)
- Final Fantasy VII characters and their shoes (man, I love you guys and your brains) (Elena, Tseng, Zack)
Promptcall!
Once again, the friendly vampire of insanity has bitten me on the neck, and it's a free-for-all call for anything to do with Final Fantasy VII, Baccano!, Gundam Wing (mostly the Magnificent Bastard people of Wing,
To spur you/me on, here, have a completely unrelated and far too cracky drabble that my ocha-fuelled brain has produced!
Hapless SOLDIERs (Third Class) A, B and C discuss SOLDIER, First Class
SOLDIER A: Patrolling sucks.
SOLDIER B: We're Third classes, what do you expect?
SOLDIER A: They spend thousands of gil putting us through crappy genetic therapy, and the best they can do is make us walk around Sector 8? At 2 in the morning? On a weekday? While paying us peanuts?
SOLDIER C: That's why everyone tries to become a First. Apparently you get to bring in personal effects and rearrange your schedule however you see fit.
SOLDIER B: The Firsts get to do whatever the hell they want whenever there isn't a call to arms in Wutai. Have you seen the training room after a slow day?
SOLDIER C: What's left of the training room, at least.
SOLDIER A: It's not just the training room. (shifts helmet) Being First suddenly means that you're allowed peripheral vision again. (shifts helmet) Is it any wonder so few SOLDIERS live to see even Second? (shifts helmet) Damn it.
SOLDIER B: If you stop twitching the thing, you might actually get used to it.
SOLDIER A: I don't think I'll ever get used to willingly suffocating myself. While wearing Shinra's really high tech idea of horse blinkers.
SOLDIER C: It keeps you faceless. Makes you more intimidating.
SOLDIER A: (still shifting helmet) Is that why being First is so bloody hard? You have to be like Sephiroth - terrifying even when the damned helmet is off?
SOLDIER B: (mildly) It's even more effective when he smiles.
SOLDIER C: Entire platoons have been motivated into action by Sephiroth smiling.
SOLDIER A: As opposed to the ones who are merely encouraged by Genesis leaving them abandoned at the top of mountain ridges?
SOLDIER B: You're not still bitter about that.
SOLDIER A: As far as I'm concerned, Genesis' idea of a good time is entirely fucked up. I don't know of any other commander who'll take his green platoon out to the Wutai border, pitch them against each other in endless training sessions, and then walk off and leave us to fend for ourselves against an ambush he more or less set up himself. Not to mention that he did this at the height of a bad season - the rebels were practically rabid for our supplies, they fought like goddamned madmen!
SOLDIER C: But you did rack up a lot of experience and a hefty bonus. Genesis brought you all back victorious, and that assault practically laid the path for Sephiroth's B-team advance.
SOLDIER A: SOLDIER has all us pretty screwed in the head if we think that nearly dying is a valuable life experience.
SOLDIER B: It is. You value life a lot more afterwards.
SOLDIER A: You're stationed under Angeal. You have no right to talk about life; for the most part, you guys actually have one.
SOLDIER B: Angeal is probably the sanest of the Firsts, yes.
SOLDIER C: And surprisingly hands-on. I hear he gets to know practically ever new SOLDIER in his platoon, especially when they're on operation.
SOLDIER B: He's taken particularly to that guy from Gongaga.
SOLDIER A: Fair? Zack Fair? The kid who thinks that buying enough gel and wax will help him have hair like Sephiroth?
SOLDIER B: Yeah, Zack. Angeal's training him up for promotion, and doing a pretty good job of it.
SOLDIER A: Does he have to use a leash? Or just he just hit Fair on the nose with a newspaper when the guy yabbers on too much?
SOLDIER B: Angeal's got pretty much infinite patience.
SOLDIER C: He's good friends with Genesis.
(pause)
SOLDIER B: Pretty much infinite patience.
SOLDIER C: Admittedly, Genesis does quote that poem a bit too much.
SOLDIER A: "The gift of the goddess." One day, someone needs to burn all the fucking copies of LOVELESS.
SOLDIER C: I'm not going to be the one picking your remains off the bottom of the Plate, thank you very much. Genesis' temper makes the worst drill sergeant seem like a kitten in comparison.
SOLDIER B: He's not too bad whenever he drops in on Angeal's sessions with us.
SOLDIER A: I think that's just because he finds Angeal very funny. Being merciful is obviously Genesis' idea of a good joke.
SOLDIER B: True. "Pampering them again, Angeal?" (parrots) And that was after we were doing our fifth set of 50 squats in physical.
SOLDIER C: At least the both of you have commanders who are around for more than half the time. Ever since he got made General, Sephiroth's turned up around once every ten missions.
SOLDIER A: What do you expect from the war hero and amazing heartthrob? If he's not too busy fending off armed militants, he's probably trying to wrangle himself free from crowds of women who'd sleep with him on the word go.
SOLDIER C: Are you jealous?
SOLDIER A: (shifts helmet) Why would I be jealous of a man who has incredible amounts of leeway within the Company, apparently no limit to his paycheck, a ridiculously overpowered inventory -- have you seen what Science gives him? -- and almost unwarranted popularity amongst both SOLDIER and the female demographic?
SOLDIER C: (clears throat) I see.
SOLDIER B: That's Shinra for you. There's props for being intelligent and pretty, even if you're nothing more than a army kid.
SOLDIER A: We're highly trained, Mako-infused and elite army kids.
SOLDIER B: We're still pretty much worth the shit on Sephiroth's boots, though.
SOLDIER C: (sighs) Heads up, it's time we got back to HQ.
SOLDIER A: Another night, and another six hours of time killed in the service of Shinra's public protection policy. (yanks off helmet) Free air at last!
[Edit:] The comments are where all the replies are going to go. Right now, we've got:
- Final Fantasy VII characters and their hobbies (Rufus, Sephiroth, Angeal, Tseng)
- Final Fantasy VII characters and their shoes (man, I love you guys and your brains) (Elena, Tseng, Zack)
no subject